Finding our Window of Tolerance: A Somatic Approach to Anxiety Therapy in Denver, CO
By Jordan Kurtz (she/her), MA, LPCC, Denver Anxiety Therapist
Anxiety can be such a consuming feeling that we often cannot consciously identify in the moment how our bodies accommodate for it.
Our ancestors and us modern folks today respond to threats in the same ways: by “shutting down” or “revving up”. In other terms? Fight, flight, or freeze.
While different circumstances prompt different responses, humans are creatures of habit and we tend to have default reactions to stress influenced by our genes, caregivers, or cultural norms.
Why is it important to know whether I “shut down” or “rev up”?
To prepare for situations in which we know stress will be present
To be equipped with grounding techniques that feel authentic to us when in crisis
To monitor our bodily capacity for stress and step back (when possible) if we sense flooding is coming
To be able to verbalize to others what soothes us so we are not as alone in our anxiety
Below we will further break down three bodies of response patterns humans fall under when stress arises and ways to move towards a grounded state.
Stress Responses: Breakdown by an Anxiety Therapist in Denver, CO.
Our Optimal State: Window of Tolerance
A state of being in which we feel safe, calm, connected, and open-hearted. We are capable of staying regulated in the present moment and can attune to time of day, where our bodies are physically located, and people around us.
If stress comes our way, our frontal lobe is engaged and guides us towards sustainable decision making and connection with resources. Internally, our guts are calm and unclenched, our heart rate is steady, and our breathing is normal.
Ultimately, we feel in control of our bodily and emotional responses instead of the other way around.
“Revving Up: Hyper-Arousal/Fight or Flight”
Symptoms in a hyper-aroused state are those most commonly associated with anxiety, or the symptoms of anxiety that precede a shut down response. When we are hyper-aroused, we may feel a surge of energy or restlessness accompanied by an increased heart rate, panic like symptoms associated with tightness in the chest and/or difficulty breathing, a racing mind, and difficulty concentrating on tasks or people surrounding us.
Emotions frequently occurring in conjunction with hyperarousal are irritation, “being on edge”, and stress. To compensate for these bodily and emotional reactions, we likely attempt to match the anxiety with a competing activity of energy, whether that is fleeing from what is in front of us or potentially becoming combative (“fight” response”) with obstacles or people in our environment.
“Shutting Down: Hypo-Arousal/Freeze”
A hypo-aroused state is the exact opposite of a hyper-aroused state, where the predominating emotions and bodily responses reflect a loss of energy. We may feel disconnected from reality or our physical bodies, a loss of interest in activities or relationships, flat emotion or minimal emotion – presenting commonly as hopelessness, depression, or numbness, and our bodies match these behaviors with slower breathing patterns, diminished facial expressions and a general sense of fatigue.
In hypo-arousal, we often seek isolation to prevent overwhelm to our systems (“freeze” response). Paralysis emotionally and physically comprises our ability to seek connection with others or ourselves.
Ways to Support Yourself During Times of Anxiety - Tools from a Denver Anxiety Therapist
If You Tend to “Rev Up” When Activated:
If our survival strategies orient towards hyperarousal, ways to return to our window of tolerance must entail turning our systems “down”. Hyper-aroused stress states make all our bodily systems run too hot- digestive, cardiovascular, muscular, and immune. To cool down, we need to engage in soothing practices that physiologically orient us towards safety.
Practices you can engage in outside of therapy or in the therapy room include:
Box breathing
Aromatherapy- especially lavender and vanilla
Guided meditation
Weighted blankets
Walking, slow running, stretching
Nature sounds or relaxing music
Petting animals or soft materials
Drinking warm water or tea
Warm bath or shower
Tactile stimulation (i.e. hand massage)
If You Tend to “Shut Down” When Activated
If our survival strategies orient towards hypo-arousal, ways to return to our window of tolerance must entail turning our systems “on”. Hypo-aroused states induce bodily, mental and emotional collapse or immobilization. Therefore, best practices for regulation here include re-attunement to the present and moving away from numbness and disassociation.
Practices you can engage in outside of therapy or in the therapy room include:
Aromatherapy- especially spearmint, citrus and cinnamon
Aerobic exercise- fast walk, run, skip, jumping jacks, pushups
Splashing cold water on our face or wrists
Squeezing an ice cube
Cold air on our body or face
Chewing gum, mints, or cinnamon candies
Using a fidget spinner or playing with a ball
Optional Call to Action: Reflection on Your Stress Reaction State with a Trusted Person
Neither hyper-arousal nor hypo-arousal is “bad”; they are merely protective states that reflect our body enduring a stressor.
Whichever state you recognize yourself sinking into when anxiety arises, consider how another trusted person could be grounding for you in these moments: what would you want to hear from someone? Not hear from someone? Are there grounding activities you both like to share? Could they offer you physical touch, or do you need space?
Offer yourself the time to reflect on a circumstance in which you felt anxious, and imagine how another could serve as another form of grounding.
Examples of how to share these needs with someone could include:
I notice when I get anxious I feel ___. It would be helpful for me if you could remind me of _____ when I do.
When I become anxious I lose track of time and focus. I would love your help bringing me back to the moment by ____
I feel paralyzed and unable to think clearly when I am anxious. Could we hold off on making decisions together in those moments until I feel more centered?
Find Your Window of Tolerance - Reach Out to Begin Anxiety Therapy in Denver, CO.
Anxiety therapy in Denver, CO can help you explore your stress response, process through anxiety triggers and associated trauma, and access your window of tolerance. Read our previous blog to learn more about how anxiety therapy can help heal anxiety.
Reach out today to explore if anxiety therapy in Denver is right for you! Follow these three steps to get started:
Schedule a free 20-minute consult call to see if anxiety therapy in Denver is a good fit!
Connect with the CZTG anxiety therapist of your choice via a phone consult.
Begin your healing from anxiety!
Meet The Writer: Jordan Kurtz, Anxiety Therapist in Denver, CO.
Jordan Kurtz (she/her) is a Denver anxiety therapist, couples counselor, and staff writer at CZTG. Jordan focuses on therapy for anxiety, trauma, adolescence, and relationships. Her approach is authentic, warm, and affirming, which she interweaves throughout her use of advanced evidence-based modalities, including EMDR, Emotion Focused Therapy for Couples (EFT), and somatic therapy. She provides anxiety therapy in Denver and virtually throughout the state of Colorado. If you’d like to work with Jordan, feel free to reach out to schedule a consultation call.