How to Calm Anxiety and Regulate Your Nervous System
By Jordan Kurtz, MA, LPC, Denver Anxiety Therapist
Anxiety is a universal human experience with roots in evolutionary processes. Worry or fear prompts vigilance, helps us stay attuned to and avoidant of threats, and can maintain social harmony. However, living in chronic fight-or-flight mode is non-adaptive. It depletes our nervous system, body, and morale.
Whether we experience anxiety intermittently, conditionally, or daily, below are some regulating mechanisms that can keep anxiety at bay.
Body-Based Tools to Calm Anxiety in the Moment
Use Movement to Release Anxiety
When anxiety builds, it often shows up as restlessness in the body. Instead of trying to fight it, give that energy somewhere to go. Small, intentional movements can help your nervous system discharge that excess activation and begin to settle.
This might look like:
fidgeting with something in your hands
rubbing your fingertips together
taking a short walk
visiting calm places in Denver
stretching, dancing, or doing a few jumping jacks
spending time in a calm environment or petting an animal
The goal is to support your body in moving through the feeling it rather than getting stuck in it.
Create Stillness to Signal Safety
When anxiety rises, your system is often scanning for danger. Intentionally slowing things down can help your body recognize that you’re safe enough to pause.
This might look like:
pulling over if you’re driving and giving yourself a moment
stepping away for a brief break, like going to the bathroom
putting your phone down and reducing stimulation
sitting or lying down and letting your body settle
turning off music or background noise
Stillness in this moment is aimed at creating just enough space for your nervous system to come out of high alert.
Use Your Breath to Calm Your Nervous System
Your breath is one of the fastest ways to signal to your body that it’s safe to slow down. When anxiety is high, breathing often becomes shallow and quick, which keeps your nervous system in a state of alert.
Slowing your breath—especially your exhale—can help shift your system out of fight-or-flight and into a more regulated state.
One simple way to practice this is with box breathing:
inhale slowly for 4 seconds
hold for 4 seconds
exhale slowly for 4 seconds
repeat for a few cycles
You don’t need to do this perfectly. Even a slight slowing of your breath can begin to create a sense of steadiness in your body.
Ground Yourself Through Physical Sensation
When anxiety takes over, your attention often gets pulled out of the present and into “what ifs” or worst-case scenarios. Grounding brings you back into your body and into what is actually happening right now.
By focusing on physical sensation, you give your nervous system something concrete to orient to, which can help interrupt that sense of overwhelm.
You might try:
a 5 senses check-in: name 3 things you can see, hear, feel, smell, and taste around you
holding or placing something cold, like an ice cube on your wrists or behind your ears
eating something with a strong flavor, like something salty, sweet, or minty
gently fanning yourself or noticing air on your skin
placing your feet flat on the ground and pressing them into the floor
Mental Strategies to Manage Anxiety and Interrupt Spirals
Interrupt Anxious Thought Loops
Anxiety often pulls you into predicting what will happen next—and usually toward the worst-case scenario. Instead of trying to eliminate those thoughts, it can be more helpful to shift into observing what is actually happening in the moment.
When you approach a situation from a place of observation rather than prediction, you create space between the thought and your reaction.
For example, a thought like “Everyone will think I’m a loser” might lead you to withdraw or avoid engaging. That withdrawal can then be misread by others, reinforcing the very belief you started with.
Instead, try to slow things down and notice:
what you’re feeling emotionally
what’s happening in your body
what thoughts are showing up
From there, you can decide how you want to respond, rather than reacting automatically from anxiety.Talk It Out Instead of Holding It In
Anxiety feeds itself in a vacuum. Ask trusted loved ones and peers for help, reassurance of fears, and healthy distraction.
Reality-Check The Story Anxiety is Telling You
Anxiety has a way of telling a very convincing story. It often sounds like: “I’ll never get through this,” “This is going to go terribly,” or “I’m always going to feel this way.”
Instead of trying to argue with those thoughts, gently reality-check them.
You might do this by:
recalling specific moments when you’ve gotten through something difficult before
writing down evidence that contradicts the worst-case scenario
reminding yourself that anxiety tends to feel permanent, even when it isn’t
You don’t need to convince yourself everything is fine. The goal is to create a little distance from the thought so you can see it more clearly—recognizing that what you’re feeling is real, while also remembering it doesn’t define what will happen next or how things will always be.
Break Things Down When You Feel Overwhelmed
When anxiety is high, even simple tasks can start to feel unmanageable. It’s not because you’re doing something wrong—your system is overloaded, which makes it harder to think clearly or prioritize.
Instead of trying to tackle everything at once, narrow your focus.
Start by asking:
what actually needs to be done right now
what can wait
Then take one small, immediate step.
Breaking things down helps your nervous system shift out of overwhelm and into something more manageable, where you can begin to feel a sense of traction again.
Track Progress and Reinforce Wins
Anxiety tends to narrow your focus toward what isn’t working. It can make it easy to overlook progress, even when it’s happening.
Intentionally tracking small wins helps shift that pattern.
You might notice:
moments where you responded differently than you normally would
times you stayed present instead of avoiding
even small steps forward that would have felt harder before
Writing these down or briefly reflecting on them can help your brain register change. Over time, this builds a more balanced view of your experience and reinforces the shifts you’re working toward.
Begin Anxiety Therapy in Denver
These techniques can be helpful for managing some of the intensity of anxiety on our own. But anxiety therapy is often necessary to help us move through anxiety completely. Our team of Denver anxiety therapists approach healing from anxiety with a somatic, trauma-focused approach.
In trauma-focused anxiety therapy, we’re able to support your nervous system in processing through the root causes of anxiety, not just temporarily relieve the symptoms. If you’d like to learn more about anxiety therapy with us, reach out for a free consultation call.
Follow these three steps to get started:
Reach out to schedule a free 20-minute consult call.
Connect with the Denver anxiety therapist of your choice via a phone consult.
Begin healing from anxiety and seeing positive changes in your life!
About the Writer: Jordan Kurtz
Jordan Kurtz (she/her) is a trauma and relationship therapist at CZTG who focuses on therapy for grief, trauma, adolescence, and couples. Jordan is authentic, warm, and affirming of her clients’ identities and experiences.